My life is not dumb enough!

It has been over a month since I last logged on to this site. I have gone through so many changes, mentally and emotionally in that time. I thought for a moment I would never even log on again. Today I feel like sharing a bit…and so I shall share.

I am changing…I have changed. I have been forced to change I guess. I woke up one morning and realized that I have lived for someone else my entire life (there have been different people at different times; not just one particular person). There is no me! If there is a me I don’t know who she is. I am not going on a quest to find myself…I don’t really think I want to be found. I do however, think that I want to dumb down my life. I want to dumb it down in all areas. From the prestigious schools my children attend, to the extravagance of this 5 bedroom 3300 sq ft home, to the hustle and bustle of getting my kids to and fro, to the constant running of my mind. I want solitude… I want peace.

It is frustrating because no matter where I go there is an inner drive inside of me that wants to strive for the best. I want that drive to turn off! I want it off until I decide to turn it on again. As of 3 days ago, I am now 34. What if I die tomorrow? Is this how I want my life to be remembered? That she was always busy…always doing….always…always…always. That is me the fixer! I don’t want to try and fix anything anymore! I honestly would love if someone tended to my needs just as much I as tend to theirs. But that quest is now over. I am hanging that up to dry…..

What’s next, you ask? I begin my search. I am searching for just the right amount of solitude for me and my babies. Just the right amount of frequency so I can tap in when I want to and turn off when I want to. I’ll share my journey…although I don’t know if it will be interesting. I am on a mission to dumb this life down. This is my heart…July 6-2013.

UNmasking my current struggle!

I have recently been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis! Yeah that was my reaction too! What the heck is that lol! Basically my body is producing antibodies that are killing off my thyroid gland! My body is at war with itself! 😣
I don’t know of anyone in my family with this disease, although they say it’s hereditary.
There are many symptoms…I’m still learning about it. Stay tuned for more posts as I learn. Here’s how I knew something was wrong:

•My throat was burning and I felt as though something was stuck in there. It was very painful to swallow.

• My hair started falling out in clumps! I am almost bald around my hairline (the area where my hair is thinnest).

• I am MORE fatigue and MORE irritated than usual! Ha! Imagine that!😃

So there it is, a visual on what I’ve been struggling with. Hashimoto’s is not life threatening but it really does something to a lady’s self esteem when your hair is falling out in clumps. Also I have 6 kids…I don’t need anymore fatigue! I thank God for all He’s done…stay tuned😉

Here’s where I am completely bald on both sides of my hairline. Yes there was thick, healthy hair there before. I’m afraid I’ll be looking like Lebron James pretty soon!

So Easy, So Yum, and Pretty Healthy

I’m not into cooking…or health food to be honest. But with my husband’s depression, and my thyroid issues (will blog about that later) I’m learning that we are going to have to eat better. I’ve also learned that his (my hubby’s) food affects his mood!
With that said I created this recipe. I don’t know the calories or whatever else we are supposed to count. I just know it’s fresh, it’s easy, and it’s a lot better than McDonalds! My kids and hubby loved it!!! There are 8 of us so I used 2lbs of meat (1lb of ground beef and 1lb of ground turkey mixed). We’re not ready for just turkey yet…but we’re getting there!
So here it is…I call it Ensalada Contenta
(Happy Salad)

1 lb of ground beef or turkey
1 can of refried beans
1 bag of shredded cheese
Fresh lettuce cut up (or buy a bag of salad)
2 Avocados (chopped or smashed)
Pico de gallo salsa (cut up tomatoes, onion, cilantro- you can find it in the fresh vegetable section or you can make your own)
1 can of stewed tomatoes
1 pack of low sodium taco seasoning

First cook the ground beef/turkey on stovetop and drain. Return it to the pan and add refried beans on medium heat. Stir continuously and add 1/3 to 1/2 the can of stewed tomatoes. **you don’t want it to be too runny.*** then add taco seasoning packet and continue to stir until warmed throughout.
Place lettuce on the plate, add meat/bean mixture, top with cheese, pico de gallo and chopped avocados!

*season to taste!

A pic of Daddy’s plate before he devoured it!

Spiritual Reflections

Look in the mirror, what do you see? Now how about spiritually? What is spiritually reflecting off of you? Just like we look in the mirror each morning to make sure our appearance is ok; we should also check our spiritual reflections.
Are we disregarding God’s Word? His will? If we are disregarding God’s will and living life how we want, we are bad representations of Christ. If we are constantly succumbing to sin and our fruits are messed up that is a reflection of our poor choices. When we represent God but continue in worldly choices we make a false representation. A non believer may not understand why we are constantly struggling and mistakenly think God has left us.
The Bible states in Romans 8:28 all things work together for our good…but that is not the whole verse! The remainder states for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. “If you love me then what?……keep my commandments!” If we’re not keeping His commandments we don’t love Him. I didn’t say that the Bible did! If you are called according to His purpose than you will do His will! Bottom line: Don’t false advertise our Lord. If you’re going to walk in flesh keep Him out of it.

Picture Credit http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LqNf2imkNj0/Tcf7LR_pNwI/AAAAAAAACF0/hlcY52ee9P8/s1600/193MirrorReflection.jpg

DRIVING YOUR CAR OFF THE ROAD

Found this insightful post over at Frank’s Cottage! Thought I’d share 🙂

Frank's Cottage

I’ve been reading a blog by a guy named Derrick Miller, who wrote about his trip in and out of Christianity and, finally, to atheism.

It’s pretty interesting reading, and Derrick makes some good points about some of the challenges of being a Christian. Among them, he notes:

•   The difficulty of reading and comprehending some parts of the Bible;
•   The challenge of living the kind of life he thought would be pleasing to God;
•   Coming to some sort of conclusion about the purpose of the universe; and
•   Understanding why there are so many Christian denominations (more than 50 in Canada alone).

Can I address these difficulties in a credible way? Some of them, perhaps, but not all. I don’t believe many people can, simply because they are huge topics requiring an incredibly wide range of knowledge.

But there’s something larger here to address. Something that Derrick’s…

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God equips us!!

I was having a rough week. I went through my closet for an upcoming garage sale. I found a bag of goodies I forgot I purchased from Family Christian Stores about 2 years ago.
2 Timothy 3:17

 

Ten-Minute Tuesday

I am trying to become more intentional in many areas of my life. Intentional in my blog postings, as well as how I parent my children and love my husband. So seeming how my blog is undergoing renovations; I am trying something new. Ten-Minute Tuesdays where I intentionally show some extra love to someone. I will share the ideas that God puts on my heart.

This Tuesday I had about 10 minutes of alone time with my older two girls. We went to Scooters Coffee shop and had frozen yogurt. I let them pile on as much junk as they wanted. Thankfully that didn’t turn out to be much.

Later my one-year old was able to get a bath all by herself. So we enjoyed 10 minutes of bath time, just her and mommy. Taking a bath alone is a rarity in this house 🙂

Ten minutes of yogurt fun with my older two girls Cyrita and Cyriah.

Ten minutes of bath time solitude with just mommy and baby girl Cyniah.

A Monday Morning Wake-Up Call

This morning I had to make a stop at the UPS store. I had a few things to ship and mail. While inside I noticed a mom who was there with her small son. He appeared to be about 3 years old, and because I am an expert at guessing the ages on little ones…..I’d say he was definitely 3.
Anyway, she was making copies and he was in the corner playing with the toys the store has there for toddlers who are dragged in there with their parents. I thought to myself how great of a mommy she was; she had her boy with her at all times and he behaved so well.

When she finished and they approached the counter he started to protest because he didn’t want to leave. The clerk joked, ” He doesn’t want to leave!” Then she responded and it totally “woke me up”.

“You know! He is driving me crazy! I am off today, and it’s my only day off and he decided to get sick! Now they won’t take him at daycare and I have to drag him along with me all day! What a wasted day off!”
The clerk was male and he said “well hopefully your whole day isn’t wasted?!”
She shrugged her shoulders and grabbed him and hopped into her Medcedes SUV and drove off.

That stung me….gosh it still stings.
I’m not writing about this to judge her, it stung me because that was me! I was the mom who put work first and wanted the kids fit into the box I conveniently made for them. I thought I was better than others because I made my children’s box with so much more room, and exciting gifts to make their stay more comfortable! Man oh man! That was me!
I am thankful for change and thankful for the little things. Although I’m still learning, Im thankful to have torn down the walls of those very boxes. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to sometimes revert back to them. But it’s times like these that put things back into perspective.

This is an example of how God shows me how He has elevated me. Can you relate? What are some things God has elevated you from?

“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians…….”

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” Mahatma Gandhi

I came across this quote today and it jumped at me right off my computer screen. I am surprised this is the first time I’ve heard of it. I would have expected to hear it thrown at Christians much more often. Upon first glance I thought this was a wonderful quote; I like many of you am tired of the misguided Christians. However, when I read this quote again God spoke something different into my spirit; I am so happy I took a second glance.

How often have we heard “What would Jesus do?” thrown at Christians as a defense mechanism? Of course we should strive to be Christlike; like Christ…not to be Christ. I Corinthians 11:1 tells us to be imitators of Christ. Have you ever tried to imitate something or someone?  Did people actually mistake you for the person you were imitating? An imitator can do well for a while but it usually doesn’t go unnoticed that he or she is just an imitation.

I am reminded of imitation cheese, imitation milk, or even imitation sugar. Many people were raised eating these items and loved the taste of them…that is until they taste the real thing! Remember when fast food restaurants like Wendy’s started using 100% real beef (so they say)? Other fast food chains had no choice but to jump on board because customers now had a taste of the real deal.

That’s just it, we imitate Christ! We are not Him! We cannot provide the real deal, we can simply tell you where to find Him. Unfortunately no matter how hard we try we are not going to be perfect. Only He was without sin and perfect. He and He alone knew the right thing to say to each and every person He encountered. We cannot ever achieve that, and that is okay because that is not what we are called to do. But the enemy loves to throw it into our face doesn’t he?

I think the WWJD phenomena and the quotes like the one mentioned from Gandhi can be used by the enemy to quiet us, make us feel inadequate, and stop us from our purpose. Many use these sayings as attacks on Christians when we do something wrong to shut us down.

How many times have you been hit with the “Only God can judge” scripture. Oh you haven’t seen that one? I think it’s found in I Tupac 7:13 🙂

Seriously, we are never going to get it right; we continue to try and that’s all we can do. We are called to account for our own lives and try our best to lead others to Christ. I challenge you to stay encouraged. You will fall, you will offend, you will sin! Luckily we are not the givers of our salvation, or anyone else’s for that matter. The next time the enemy throws one of these quotes criticisms your way let it be known that  while you are not Him, you do know of a perfect man. And remember as perfect as Jesus was, many still didn’t receive Him. Finally in response to Mahatma Gandhi I direct your attention to John 15:18 ” If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.” NIV

Be blessed

UNreal

Engage me today if you’ve ever been here: You are at your wits end in a situation, you really feel like throwing in the towel. Then all of a sudden there is an advertisement for a conference, or church service, or maybe your closest girl friends decide to get together for dinner. You think to yourself “I am going to go, maybe I will get the answer I am looking for.”

You are excited to go, and ready to bare all. All you need is a safe place, a place where you can see that you are not alone. You can receive a bit of healing just by the fact that you are not the only woman praying this prayer. While there, she is speaking. She can be your friend, the women’s fellowship leader, the host of this special conference. You think that she is going to say something that you can relate to. She is going to be real! You can feel it! Then all of a sudden she lets out her “real”. Turns out the worst thing she has ever done was to forget to warm her husband’s plate to the proper temperature for dinner.

WHAT?

Or your friend (you know the friend whose husband is sleeping around with everyone besides her) carries on with her facade that everything is ever so perfect in her marriage. She goes on and on about how they have never had any problems, and all is well in paradise.

Why are women so phony to one another? Why can’t we truly be real when it comes to what we are going through? I wish I had the answer to these questions. I can’t tell you how many times I have been to some “fresh, exciting, women’s conference only to hear the speakers sugar coat their problems. I’m sorry but if the worst thing that has happened to you is when you were 10 mins late with dinner, then you and I cannot relate.

I understand every marriage is not plagued with infidelity, or abuse. I am certainly not leading up to suggesting that. What I am stating however, is that there are times when every woman feels overwhelmed. Times when all of our self-esteem is low, and times when we feel like we are doing it all wrong. That is what makes us women, and what makes us human. We need to be real with each other so others can know they are not alone.

In a perfect world we could take off our “everything is perfect” masks and just bare it all. Not to every woman we encounter of course. But if you have close friends and they don’t know the real you; then something is quite wrong. We put so much effort into the cover-up we miss the mark on what our true purpose is. If God has given you a trial and you cover it up and never let anyone know you had it. When you get through it and have overcome it, who gets the glory? It certainly isn’t God.

I was blessed to attend a conference given by this woman. She was so raw and real it really took me by surprise. I have yet to see someone bare all, but yet walk in such confidence from The Lord. She has no idea who I am and doesn’t even know I am writing about her at all. I just want to share her with you, if you are looking for a real woman who gives some real insight on the struggles of wife, mommy, and christianity…she is your girl. I am trying to get there:-) Her name is Lara Williams and you can find her blog here. Blessings

http://www.tooverflowing.com